Journal Post 7/29/12

When I paint with watercolours, I have to tape the papers down with masking tape. Usually, I tape them down to a hardcover book. It's actually a gorgeous book filled with Hundertwasser's work. He is a man who clearly adored colour, who liked to transform boring, grey cityscapes into whimsical dreamscapes.



 I flipped through the book again for inspiration, and decided to play with solid blocks of saturated acrylic colour. The result looks nothing like the inspiration, but I could never create anything as amazing as Hundertwasser!

 

I am hoping for an awesome week! Maybe some fireworks, maybe some pride parades... prepping for the blueberry festival artwalk! We are supposed to bring a display easel, and the one that's sitting in our hallway now is extremely DIY and very old. I hope I can find a way to perfect it before saturday.

We also bought white paint for our kitchen... 0_0

No painting supplies, but the paint is here. It's like... semi-commitment.

New Mini Paintings

New mini paintings in the shop today!

Art Journal - Nice Dream

I may never grow tired of these art journals. Everything about them is perfect (for me). Perfect pages for lots of wet paint and glues, perfect size that fits easily in any bag/purse, perfect shape, flexible binding (it's not spiral but I can bend it anyway)...



Perfect for balancing on my knee with my markers and watersoluble crayons. You know, those days when I can't peel myself off of the couch. Might be a red wine and classic x-files kind of night.

Today Milo played in the bathtub, which eases my mind. He also ate his entire breakfast today! Eventually. I arrive home and this cat comes tearing around the corner, his claws digging into the carpet, his eyes begging for dinner, and I relax.

Now if only he would eat his dinner!



Available here.

Journal Post 7/25/12

Yay, a journal post. I am so incredibly stressed out I feel physically ill. A "surprise" day off from work can be the opposite of relaxing sometimes.



But I have a secret plan to get my cat Milo to stop starving himself, a plan my vet would probably dislike. Oh well. I can't just let him die, so...

I bought a small can of "urinary health" cat food. I took a small smidgen of it, added water to make a thin soup, then mixed it into some of the awful Hills S/O and it totally worked. I doubt that it will work for very long or for actual meals (he is too damn smart), but I am desperate to break his hunger strike!

Looking on the side of the can, I don't really know what makes it "urinary health formula". I don't know what makes any of the "prescription" (they're not really prescription, that's just a buzzword) foods different other than reducing the nutritional value and adding acidifiers. This is why I'm so mad.



So I am de-stressing by playing in my art journal to angry music. It doesn't really help that much, but it's better than nothing I guess.



I'm nearly finished this month's newsletter. If you haven't signed up for it yet, there is a box on the sidebar! ----->

Small Displays

I have begun to collect inspirational images for future craft show displays! My absolute favourite simple solution has to be the clothesline across a pretty frame trick. I don't buy frames, though. Instead, I take apart old canvas paintings because there is usually some lovely beveled wood hidden underneath! I painted this one turquoise. There are not enough eyelets left to finish it though.

I've signed up for a show this winter, but because craft shows aren't very affordable, I could only spring for a tiny 3-foot-wide space! I'm thinking the display above for the mini paintings, I'm thinking stacks of journals... maybe a narrow tiered display of some kind for prints and small paintings (if I can sneak them in)!

Do you have any ideas for super small spaces?

Handmade Art Journal - Violet Blossom

Today we went to the Honeybee Festival and watched someone extract honey. There was also a bee beard! I tried a root beer flavoured honey stick and it was pretty good! I'm not an avid honey eater, so the sticky texture was a bit... uncomfortable. Kind of reminded me of cough syrup, except it actually tasted good.

And then I came home and got to work putting together this journal!



Available Here.

Video - Ode to Milo

My cat is pretty much all I can think about this week! He came home on thursday in a bad way; it's obvious that he couldn't sleep for the two days he was at the hospital.

For every second of my free time I've been researching online, looking for preventative action against his blockages! There is a lot of heresay that the dry kibble diet is causing this horrorshow, and while a canned diet is awfully expensive (though less extreme than raw diet), I feel like we have no other choice.

I am caught between following our less-than-steller vet's advice of putting him on a terrible (and dry) diet of Hills C/D, or doing something that might actually MAKE SENSE.  I'm so overwhelmed with information that I can't seem to make a decision.

In the meantime, I painted a portrait of Milo while he was gone and recorded it for you guys. It's shocking the empty void he seems to leave when he isn't here!

Journal Post 7/17/12

A super simple journal page today. I like the look of simple pages and today I'm just not feeling it. We had another cat emergency today and I just couldn't focus. All I could do was follow him around the house and watch.



He has chronic urinary tract issues and luckily it's been nearly a year since the last blockage. But today he was in a lot of trouble so I had to pick up my partner from work (for emotional support) and take him into emergency to get a catheter put in. It's been irritatingly expensive. This really makes me wish I could make more money!



Oh well. 

Art journal "Summer Rain"

I was so pumped about being able to go wherever I wanted without worrying about dragging stuff onto the public transportation system that I just had to go out and buy paper for more journals.

And I've been thinking about applying for another late-year craft fair, so it would be nice to have something to take there. 



Available here.

How to Say No

No.

Seemingly the most difficult word to say to somebody.

Do you ever say "no"?
Or are you submissive like me?

Do you take on all sorts of big projects at last minute?
Do you go out when you'd rather stay home?
Do you start daily challenges but you never finish?
Do you cancel your special plans because someone begged you to take their shift at work?
Do you feed your friend's cats or house-sit for your aunt just so they don't think you're careless?

Do you feel easily stressed and overwhelmed and automatically blame everyone else for taking advantage of you?

Well, I usually do.



I said "no" today. I didn't even have a Reasonable Excuse. I just said "no" because my problem is that people get too comfortable with me. I'm always there, (seemingly) ready and willing for anything.

But today I practiced saying "no". It was incredibly uncomfortable and I agonized over it afterwards, but the world didn't end. And no one was nearly as upset as I was (from the guilt). And the best part is, I end up happier this way. It's when I am obedient... that's when I'm truly miserable.

A lady named Raina recently said to me:

 "Once you make up your mind to be better, you will be. You have not been chosen to be a loser, you are choosing it. Convince yourself that you are a winner! You are just as great as the people you know. You CAN be doing what they are doing. Or what ever you love. Just accept that you are capable and stop making excuses."



Perhaps saying "no" is the first stage of a whole new me? There is a lot that we can all take out of that piece of advice, especially the idea that:

We are not less worthy of love than anyone else.
We have more control than we think.
We don't always have to do the things we hate to do.

Do you make sacrifices all to often? Does saying "no" come easily to you?

More Mini Paintings

Put a few more mini paintings in the shop today!

Journal Rant 7/11/12

 This week I feel like I've got my boxing gloves on. There are some days where it feels like I'm wading against a strong current, and the only thing keeping me forward is one small goal. Just one. One that seems so obvious and reasonable to me, that it's hard to believe that I have to fight upstream just to get there.



There is a subtle pattern in my life in which I give and work hard for the reputation of being loyal and reliable, only to become so convenient that I end up taken for granted. Then one day I make a simple request, get a taste of it for about two weeks only to be pushed back down to square one all over again.  It is difficult for me because I was raised to be obedient with a guilt complex.



But maybe you are in a situation where you just want this simple thing, and someone or something is trying to hold you back, or trying to block your path or trying to guilt-trip you into walking away. And maybe all you need is a little boost, after all, the easiest way to keep someone down is to make them believe that they are unreasonable and wrong.

If this is you...

Fight. Fight big or fight small. Say "no" if you have to. Stand your ground and defend yourself, because you do not automatically deserve less just because you are female/male/old/young/gay/straight/anything else!

...

*Sigh*

This post probably doesn't make sense to anyone else, but I just felt like I needed a little pep talk today. I hope this works.

Self Portrait - Whoever I Want to Be

I waffled all weekend over this painting. To avoid starting it, I went camping and watched a foreign film (can't work if I'm reading subtitles) and took a nap. The challenge was to create a contemporary self portrait.



I'm not sure if this fits the description but it fits me. I used colours and imagery from Picasso's Diary. This is titled "Whoever I Want to Be", and I suppose it's a painting of me painting myself. Heh.



There are many people who believe that you can change your thought patterns if you are persistent enough. They say that if you subconsciously talk down about yourself, you can change it by replacing these thoughts with positive ones.

In this case, I am trying to instill a greater sense of self-worth and success. If I can believe that I am doing the right thing, that I can do whatever I want, that I can be who I want to be and that I deserve it just as much as everyone else, then maybe one day it will happen!

It's never enough just to dream big, but it's got to be the first step. Somehow, I don't think you can just become great without first believing in yourself. 

Donate to Papergirl Vancouver!

Here's a drawing I did last night to donate to the Papergirl in Vancouver this year! They need art that they can roll up, so I used pencil crayon instead of watercolour this time.

Volunteers on bicycles collect artwork and deliver it to random strangers along their super secret cycle route! It sounds so fun. So if you like doodling, donate some art! If you're in Vancouver, go check out the exhibition and then try to score some free art while you're out there :3



I'm also sending this 8x10" print of Gift. It seems appropriate, don't you think?

All Of My Hard Work

Here is a small painting I did today to help deal with recent feelings.

The feeling you get after years of wishing which eventually turned into months of doing which eventually turned into seven days of happiness mixed with the terror of not knowing if it was all worth it.

Yes.

 

The feeling after that when the rug is pulled out from under my feet, the last thing I'd expect to happen in such a safe place. When that safe place is suddenly no longer safe. When I am suddenly surrounded by strangers who, for all I know, may not be as nice as I give them credit for.

The feeling that maybe I shouldn't leave my apartment door unlocked when we're home. Or maybe we shouldn't leave our balcony door open when I'm in the kitchen. The feeling that maybe I shouldn't be going anywhere on my own. The feeling that when I walk down to my car, there will be someone already there waiting in the back seat.



The feeling that something is about to swoop in silently, pointlessly to chew away at my carefully placed threads. To destroy all of my hard work.

And I hope enough time passes uneventfully, and I hope one day I might be able to take life less seriously ... to be able to handle stress like a normal person.

...

I have to say, painting cross-stitch is more fun than actually cross-stitching. Ha!

Etsy Shop Update

Today I have listed all of the recent mini paintings in my etsy shop :)

Mini Paintings - Dragonfly Series

Last night I made a new set of little dragonfly mini paintings!



I've already started collecting a few pressed flowers, but it's been such a dark, rainy year for it. No hydrangeas yet, but these cherry blossoms worked ok.



No dragonfly sightings yet though!



Weather is a bit damp but there's a patch of blue sky... good enough for me! Let's go to the beach!